Mom – 1 Year On
So as the 1st anniversary of my Mom’s death approaches I have again gone down the path of writing that has served me so well in the past and will again in the future. Firstly I have no idea where the last 12 months of my life have gone. I have had a number of a rough days but as the year has progressed things have become slightly easier, only slightly though!!
It really only is when you lose someone so close you realise what is important , slowly but surely I am returning to the old Cian but there have been changes to the way I do things. Thankfully Mom has left me in a good position to be able to look after myself and not be a burden to people.
Since Mam passed away I have doubted myself on countless occasions, but thanks to counselling I have been able to get my head together and straighten myself out. As the days grew into weeks and then months I realised I need to start looking after myself and although I have yet to really push on from what happened I can finally feel my mood shifting and I also am not losing patience as quickly as I had been and that is thankfully a good thing.
It has taken me most of the 12 months to cop on and realise people are only there to offer advice , now whether I have listened to that advice is another story entirely !! To anyone that has lost someone dear to them since last September I offer my sincere condolences and I would like to thank so sincerely all the people that have helped us out and that have been so good to me in the last 12 months.
If I have need anything , a lift or anything like that people have stepped forward and helped me out and I again wish to thank each of you so sincerely , I really don’t have the words that would truly express how grateful I am to you all. The other thing that I have realised since Mam passed away is how missed she is by not only my family but by friends, and work colleagues alike.
Many times I have been told I remind people of Mam and finally as the 1st anniversary approaches I can fully appreciate that particular compliment. Mam and Dad did a great job raising myself and Fionn.
In the coming years I hope I can make her proud , I hope to get going with a couple of opportunities that are there for me as the next few weeks unfold. Of course the Rose Of Tralee happened last Monday and Tuesday and with Ashling Walsh involved I had a real hint of regret that Mam wasn’t around because I have no doubt she would have been stuck in the middle of all the fun and games in the Dome last week, Well done Ashling !!
Lastly this year has been absolute hell at times and then on other occasions it hasn’t been too bad but I suppose that is the way life is and as Mam’s 1st anniversary approaches I hope to try and make positive steps forward and as I have so often been told, “Dust yourself off and get on with it “So now I will do exactly that and get on with!!
Mam’s 1st anniversary mass takes place on Saturday September 16th at 6pm in Tarbert.
Cian Mc Gibney