I have finally done what has been asked of me and hinted at and cut the apron string !! Mother of course would be extremely happy to finally see me out on my own and fending for myself. The last number of weeks has been good fun, the settling in period took about 5 minutes…
I know how fortunate I am to be in this position as I felt many times that I’d never manage to move but thank god I have been in a position to take up the offer to move in here. As I sit here typing I truly can say I am content and happy. There is satisfaction to be able to sit down and write those words down and mean them.
As I have written so many times, I have had many dark moments but for the first time I can really type these words and mean them, I am Happy. I have found that any headaches or feeling rough has been replaced by contentment.
I know it’s an easy word to say contentment but to be able to write and mean it is key. I don’t feel like I want to moan or give out half as much. Life seems like the way it should do. I know too that it isn’t the case for many and trust me when I say there is light at the end of the tunnel.
I never thought I’d see or reach the light I speak of but take it from the man who reached rock bottom and only for a phone call would not be sitting here, there is help there and things will improve I promise.
Mother’s anniversary falls next month on September 10th. It will mark 7 years since the shit hit the fan on that Wednesday evening. So much has changed no more than her eldest finally finding his feet and her youngest son going down on one knee and proposing.
She would have had a serious amount of good news to deal with over a short number of weeks but she can now say her two lads are standing on their own two feet. I was the one that caused most concern in that regard but Mother and my father didn’t do too bad a job with us.
Those markers of one proposing and one moving on and paying my own bills have been reached so thank you Anne Marie and Rory. I have been patted on the back and congratulated by so many it’s been overwhelming and has made think deeply, long and hard about what may be next.
I now want to talk to those who told me I was mollycoddled and “minded” by mother in there opinions for far too long. This is me, 33, out of home it took longer than it should have I know that but could you now start treating me like an adult and not the 12 year old you think you see when you speak to me.
Whose son or daughter isn’t minded by their parents, in the words of Roy Keane “That’s their job” Yes I over stayed my welcome at home but I found the knife to cut the apron strings and did so. It’s now time to set myself the next challenge and see how I go.
The change in my mood seems to be permanent and now It’s time to focus on a future that at several points over the last 9 years I didn’t think I’d see….